Private - Wyatt's Journal | Solstice Roleplay

Private Wyatt's Journal

#1
*Written in common, this is a simple text file saved to Wyatt's PDA, wherein he occasionally writes. Obviously. Of course, any particularly skilled hackers are able to decode the simple encryption placed on it.*

I've never kept one of these before.

Then again, I've never done a lot of things before- like stay in one place for...what, almost two months now? Let alone stay with a girl for this long- without any serious physical contact.
And it's hard to do. I'm not used to this- Or the drama, or emotions that come with it. I've gotta start looking out for my own health now- instead of being care free. I've got to make sure she's happy and safe and all that garbage. And...that's hard to do, especially when it comes to Psionic stuff.

I'm apparently deaf to this sort of thing- but I've seen the way it affects her. Induces panic attacks, creates discomfort- Sure, Ammon saved my life with his Psionic powers but they seem to be nothing but a detriment to her, and I can't do anything about them.

And this relationship feels like a lifetime already. I love her. She's great, and amazing, but I guess I miss that life. Going from place to place, girl to girl- never too much of a concern. And not only that, but she's so fundamentally different than I am. Raised on a station. I can't ever imagine not having a Home Planet, a place you're tied to. I'm doubting if this was a good idea. I mean, shit- I was drunk when all this started, anyway. Suppose we'll see.

I've taken to being Joel's wingman, I guess, since I can still do my thing and get him something out of it.

I don't know. And the roles have been flipped, no less. She's the one who's constantly stressed, constantly in danger, constantly hurt- hell, she was the one who returned fire when Legate yeeted me in the head with that table.
We're moving soon, apparently. Says she still has paperwork to finish up, then she has to go scout, and find more staff. We get little time together, and rarely any private time to be intimate. Not even sexual, just intimate. I offered it today, but she said she needed space and wanted to sleep in the office? Fuck. I dunno. Can't even talk to her about this shit because she's busy all the time and when she isn't busy we're with friends or there's drama going on.

I don't know why I'm even writing this damn thing. It's the same as talking to myself. Nobody's ever gonna see it.

I think this might've been a mistake on my part. I'll wait until after this whole moving thing is done, and maybe we'll move in together. Might change things.
Three weeks.
 
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